Hey there.

First of all, I am so sorry you're experiencing this.

Second, I am you years from now. Also Canadian who moved to the US, got married and had a child with an abusive alcoholic. It took me 6 years to leave that relationship and now I am unable to go home.

I promise you, the shame you are feeling is a reaction to the abuse and not anything you should be ashamed of. Please go home. I wish I would have. It won't get better. His threats of what will happen if you leave are empty threats to keep his control over you.

You do not need to stay. Ask for help from your family or a friend. Change your ticket and go home. You're absolutely correct that someone who truly loved you wouldn't do things to hurt you. Love doesn't hurt.

No one who matters will shame you for leaving an abusive situation. Anyone who does doesn't deserve to be in your life. Good luck. I'm praying for you. ♥️