He sounds a whole lot like my husband. My husband thinks he has aspergers, and my friends agree, he hasn't been diagnosed officially, but he does have a huge number of the symptoms and behaviours. He isn't a big fan of getting gifts, they make him feel awkward unless they're food, although he has learned to graciously accept gifts he doesn't like. He does rage when stuff doesn't work properly, I got him a tablet for Christmas and it wasn't responding as well as it should, he was fighting with the clock settings and stuff, he started shouting at it, and I was afraid he'd throw it or punch it or something. You may have to do what I did and start buying your own Christmas. Do you think he was offended that you didn't like the gift? Could he have been upset that he thought he got you something you'd like, since you like minecraft, and it still didn't go well? Does he make as much money as you do? I'd be hard pressed to spend over $50 on any one gift myself, but I'm also the sole breadwinner and we are barely scraping by.
His explosion towards you where he listed all your flaws and such, makes me think he does care about you and worry about you but he went overboard with the severity, the same way my guy does. Next year and at other times you would like him to shop for you, make a wish list on amazon or something. That way it's still a suprise what you get, and you get something you wanted...as long as you don't go check and see what is missing from the list.
So don't be sad you bought yourself the thing. Keep it and when he asks after his thing, explain that you blew over $600 on Christmas for him and his family and now can't afford it.
I am in an emotionally abusive relationship. With his suspected aspergers, he believes that he is also in an emotionally abusive relationship. I've been in therapy for the better part of a year now and I just about died when he said that during our last argument. If you aren't happy, you should leave while you still can. Once you get married it's so much harder. I don't really believe my guy is on the spectrum anymore, I think it's just his excuse to behave like an asshole and get away with it.