First of all, I'm so sorry for the shit you've had to deal with, namely your faher's abuse, mental health conditions, and the difficulties with championing feminism.

As someone who struggles with mental health too, I know it can be really challenging to deal with all of the misogyny and hatred we get for being a feminist and a woman.

My advice to you is to not do it if you don't feel it is doing your mental health any good, and is only causing you harm. The number one most important thing is for you to take care of yourself first, before taking care of others or a cause.

I would suggest only participating in "debatey" threads or posting in subs where a lot of brigading occurs when and if you are feeling well enough to handle it - the vile misogyny that we encounter in such subs can be very difficult to read. If you do end up encountering comments or posts that break the sidebar rules, especially straight up trolling/misogyny, please report them, the mods will get to your reports and be able to ban the trolls a lot faster.

Also some people have asked similar questions or posted about similar topics here and on r/AskFeminists, so check them out.

When I'm feeling at my most vulnerable I like to participate more in r/TrollXChromosomes to get my venting out. r/WitchesvsPatriarchy is also great for that. Both subs post a lot of humorous things too, which can be uplifting.

It really sucks, I know, you're not the only one who hates it. But things are slowly changing. Outrage culture (i.e. "Feminist gets OWNED by FACTS AND LOGIC" type posts/videos) is getting called out for the scam that it is nowadays. r/BreadTube has been AMAZING for helping me see that YES there are plenty of feminists online, and that "lefty tube" is finally having a moment. Check out ContraPoints, Claudia Brown, Shaun, hbomberguy, etc on Youtube, it really helps to feel a part of a community and their videos are great and usually very well researched.

Also feel free to use the "disable inbox replies" button if you just want to reply to someone's antifeminist opinion somewhere on Reddit but you're not feeling well enough to get into a neverending, useless comment debate with someone who isn't arguing in good faith. It helps me a lot.

Feel free to message the mods any time you are experiencing abuse or harassment in this sub, or if you're unsure if something breaks the rules or not.

Hope that helps!