Yeah thank you. I've realised I just need to ignore her now. I think it's good I've been stabbed with a plier. I'm actually GLAD. I know that sounds ridiculose, but she's always the victim in every situation - even when she's not, and I am. I'm always blamed for everything.
Guess who got blamed for all the shit she did today? Me. Everything she does, everything she says, I'm blamed for.
I was blamed until I held up my arm and I think they realised 'oh shit', and that I was the victim and NOT to blame for every single fucking thing. And probably realised that this was not normal.
When I 'hurt' her, e.g. a punch in the arm, I'm screamed at and told they are going to call the police, when she has hurt me more. My knee is fucked because she kicked it one day and I'm pretty sure chipped it somehow. But because nothing was on the surface, and I wasn't screaming and crying like her - somehow she was more hurt.
My dad actually told me, HE was going to call the police on me, because I wacked her in the face not even hard and she was SCREAMING (she was screaming because I actually hit her, frustrated screaming, as she is stronger and thought I never could). Yes the man that use to tackle me to the ground, kick me, smack me with all his strength, said he was going to call the police on ME.
I'm happy also that my mum finally wasn't solely blaming me. Even brought up my dad's abuse and said to him none of this would have happened if he didn't bring violence into this family, if he didn't beat us. Granted, they were saying I 'was fucked', but because of him. Which is bitter sweet I guess, they are finally realising I'm not to blame for every single thing, and he did something that screwed us all up, including me.
Sorry for ranting and going on lol, thank you very much for your comment.
I do think sometimes my mum's reactions are a bit narcissistic, "you guys stop, you're ruining my day" "my day is ruined" "I wanted to have a nice day off". She just gets so stressed and just talks about us ruining her and sometimes yells she can't wait for me to move out. I totally understand this is stressful, but I PLEAD with her to make it stop. I seriously say "mum please make her stop, please tell her to stop saying those things, they hurt". She told me I needed thicker skin and to toughen up. That's when I snapped and wacked her. Because what the hell do I do if words don't work? Or she won't make her stop?
To me it's like she's stabbing me in the gut. Am I going to let her just stand there and stab me? No I'm going to make it stop, because it hurts and is fucking me up.
I now know to walk away and ignore, thank you.
I want her to see a someone yes. I'm 98% sure she has ADHD, which makes her dumb and hard to teach and hard to live with. She needs medication for that ASAP.