Are you a unicorn?

I mean this seriously. Are you the mystical friend the world is searching for? Everyone, from dating ads to biographies claims they are looking for the friend that has never talked about another friend behind their back. Is that you? Tell me straight. Is that you? You NEVER did this? You are the one human being on the planet? Cause you would make a fortune.

I know right now it isn't true. You are the same well-meaning, well-behaved person I am. You play by the rules. You don't cheat on your SO. You keep the social standards, you don't say the rude thing to someone's face, and you occasionally gossip about people. You do this because you are human and you're pretending you're better than that because this is the internet. No one can call you out.

Why didn't we ask her to her face? We did, in so many words. We got an answer of sorts, we didn't buy it, we moved on. She didn't want to talk about it, so we stopped asking. Because, you know, we were friends. We understood that the reason was more complicated than she cared to explain and we left it at that. Because we were friends. We did what she asked, we tried to make sense of it, and when we couldn't we conferred among ourselves. We came to our own conclusions (most of which I've left out of this post...because she and I are friends) and dropped it. We now call her by her preferred name (except me, because I am shit at names though I do sincerely try and she knows it).

No one was snide. No one was glib. No one was disrespectful. We asked, we got a non-answer, we made our best guesses and moved the fuck on. And, just for the record, her family new LESS than us. We were her family at that point.

You know not of what you speak.