I posted this originally in r/relationship_advice but the feedback was really negative, so I'm hoping to be met with more understanding here.

Yes you clearly dont understand at all what's being said and if you do then you have absolutely no idea what a healthy person is.

Polyamory is not an identity or uncontrollable orientation. It's a lifestyle choice revolving around relationships, just like monogamy. It's no different than being single.

It isnt about whether you are allowed to "be yourself" it's about being healthy enough to be happy regardless of your current status. Which you either dont understand, or disagree with, and if you disagree with it, then you are just flat out wrong since it goes against literally everything we know about humans and psychology.

Polyamory isnt like being gay or trans, it's just a choice we make about how we want to live our lives, and just like all aspects of life, a healthy person finds joy regardless of their current status.

If you arent currently dating anyone, you arent engaging in polyamory, you are single. You arent polyamorous when you are single. You are just a person who is single. It takes two people to agree on the concept for it to be engaged in. And since it's something that you can change at literally any time if you choose, it's just a lifestyle choice, not an identity.

/r/polyamory Thread Parent