Came here to say that I was in the same boat as you. Still am to some degree, but life just keeps getting better. I'm a high school sophomore guy, and am making huge progress in eradicating social anxiety and doubt.
I know how it's easy to be overwhelmed by things. Where to start improving yourself, how to be motivated, how long it will take to improve yourself...
1 | Start Small
The thing is, improving yourself doesn't just happen and leave its effects for the rest of your life. It's a lifelong process that should be consciously pursued every day, every hour, every second of your life. Improving yourself means taking action, and I don't mean making huge leaps and bounds. Start small. If you find yourself wasting time on the computer, take a walk. Try it every single day. It really makes a difference. Meditate for ten minutes. Draw something. Read a few pages of a book. Try small social experiments that will will open you up further to easier socializing. Earlier this evening, I took an hour long walk and said "good evening" to every single person I walked past. Feeling great.
2 | New things
This is related to the previous step. You say that you are in a bad position right now - low confidence, social awkwardness, (possible) low self-discipline, being overwhelmed with these problems. Well, if you're in a bad position, the only thing to do is to change that position. And that means doing new things. The reason why you are in this rut is because of lack of change. So, to start from the ground up, not only must you start small, but every day is a new day for you to do something that you haven't done before. It also gives you the opportunity to scope out new interests and meet new people.
3 | Discipline
I remember spending my evenings watching motivational video after motivational video, reading instructive article after instructive article. I felt amazing after each one. Every single evening, I was convinced that the next day would be the day that I scored huge socially, that I approached that girl or made some new friends.
And every single day, I sat forlornly in my seat, wishing that I could just talk to that girl or those guys over there.
In a case like this, motivation has practically no effect. Let me tell you something else that relates to this topic.
Emotion follows action.
Essentially, if you follow through with the previous two steps, and try new, small things in your life, the joy of having done those things will follow. That's the beauty of discipline, and the above two steps. By starting small, new things, you set yourself up for success by creating new habits that you can follow through with every day. And the happiness follows that, creating a cycle of taking action, joy, taking more action.
Once you get into this cycle, you can use motivational material as a supplement. But ultimately, by launching yourself into the habit of taking action and making change, you are setting yourself down a path of life improvement–a habit that only grows, and grows, and grows. By developing discipline in these ways, you can also help rid yourself of your internet addiction.
You'll probably want to develop discipline in other aspects of your life. I heartily recommend /r/getdisciplined if you haven't been to there already. However, do not rely on internet material like reddit for help too much–it only reinforces the urge to use the internet. If you constantly make little, positive actions in your life, you won't need the internet so much.
Some other thoughts I would like to share with you.
This is something insightful that my friend told me. When I was having issues, he essentially sat me down and said:
"Jayvi, what it ultimately comes down to is prioritizing. Do one thing that will make you feel like a badass. Then do another thing. You have to make yourself happy before you can anybody else. Prioritize what comes next, what you have to do, then do it. If you feel anxious about alllll the other things you have to do, well, you have to start small before you do huge things. The little things add up."
Why do I place so much emphasis on taking action? When you do not, you become paralyzed by overthinking. Taking action is essentially knocking over a domino: once you begin, you just keep going and going.
http://www.reddit.com/r/getdisciplined/comments/1q96b5/i_just_dont_care_about_myself/cdah4af
There's so much I left unsaid, but I really want for you to focus on the three ideas I listed below. Small, new things, discipline (repeating until a habit is formed). If you have any other questions or problems, please feel free to PM me.