I did some things that I regret but he was much worse and a lot of what I did was because I didn't know what else to do to be heard or still retain control over my life. So I would lie rather than have to argue. Or pretend to cry because he would almost always stop yelling. I snooped through his FB messages because I needed to have visible proof that he was cheating to confront him with because I thought if I had proof he couldn't argue his way out of it and would have to stop. That was a stupid idea. This relationship eventually went the way of the dodo bird. Now that I am in a healthy relationship, I never have to lie or manipulate anyone anymore.