He sounds like me. I've been suffering with depression that varies in intensity for the last couple of years and brushing your teeth, or taking care of yourself are equatable to climbing Everest. You just don't care how you look/don't have the energy and it becomes a self fulfilling prophecy. You start looking unsightly which confirms your belief that you are disgusting and that no one would ever want to love you. The only thing that gets me motivated is my husband being brutally honest and saying things like - 'I love you, but you stink and you need to have a bath and brush your teeth today.' That shocks me back into action. Luckily I'm in position where I don't have to leave the house, so don't see people often. Another reason to 'slob out'. I keep the house very clean, and am anal about things on counters etc being in line and straight, and thought the other day - 'I care more about this house being clean than I do myself.' It was sobering. An 'epiphany' if you like.

Also, he may have had a horrible childhood dentist like I did - the neighbourhood kids used to call him 'The Butcher'. There's a real fear in going through pain like that again, even if unfounded. That leads to not seeing another dentist, and more dental problems.

I've lately made my own dentist appointments and gone on my own, only 4 times though, I need to make more appointments as soon as we're back on medical aid. I had to do it on my own to prove to myself that if I could conquer the fear, I could do anything. Great dentist and it didn't hurt a bit. Best thing I ever did. Still have a lot of work that needs to be done, and I'm still scared and not looking forward to it. I'm doing it though. Tell him to find the right dentist and ask people for recommendations. My new dentist is brilliant and disproves everything I ever believed/terrorised myself with as far as dentists go.