At what point is a future MIL a deal breaker?

My ex boyfriend's mother was bipolar. the medicine she is on causes her to be very flat emotionally. I'm a very happy, perky person. So, I would try to develop that girlfriend/mother of the boyfriend relationship and it just never really happened.

My ex finally got diagnosed with bipolar disorder last Fall and when it first happened he had to go to a mental facility for 21 days. His mother was so calm and emotionles about the whole thing. When he came home, he moved in with me a month later. His mother never checked on him or us. It was just me..taking care of him, making sure he took his meds, making sure he showered, and everything until he finally got to where he was back to a somewhat version of himself. I know he is a guy in his mid-twenties and should be able to be responsible for himself, but a phone call from her to see how things were going or if we needed anything would've been nice. Even just someone I could've talked to about it since she had dealt with it firsthand.

I ended up feeling so depended on, that it exhausted me emotionally and I became bitter and resentful towards her about it.

He ended up losing his job and when it came time for needing help with the rent and utilities, his mom only helped for a couple months and then told him he could move back home even though his family could've helped him get back on his feet very easily because they were very financially comfortable. He moved home and I ended up with an apartment I couldn't afford alone. I had helped him so much and we had been together for almost 4 years, but when it came down to it, she wasn't willing to help me when her son dropped the ball, it was all about her baby boy to her..

I finally broke up with him and had to move back home. And now that I'm out of the relationship bubble, I realized I wouldn't want a MIL that wasn't willing to help me and my SO out when absolutely need be. It really ended up hurting my feelings because I didn't feel that I meant anything to her or their family in the end.

/r/AskWomen Thread