“Somethings not quite right” said the mage. Do you sense a trap? “No.. cookies.” “..sorry?” “I smell cookies” Ser Bastin hesitated. “I don’t think cookies are going to thwart us now. We’ve outsmarted the scaly winged creatures, overcome poison, braved the treacherous mountain-“ “No its just.. and flowers look. What sort of beast bakes cookies and keeps a neat and tidy flower bed?” asked Veyla surveying the tasteful and homely garden, complete with picket fence and bird table outside the beast’s lair.
“Maybe its the wrong.. cave?” offered Ser Bastin. But before they could investigate further a deep and hearty laugh began to rumble from the cave opening. “Ah! You’ve made it!” Their beast emerged to their bemused silence. “Oh! I’m so sorry you’ll have to excuse the apron. It’s my wife’s.” The silence continued. “Well… you must be tired from your travels across my land. Do come on in.” He retreated into the cave. “That’s the Fell Beast of the Barren Hills?!” Hissed Veyla. “…well he is hairy like the tales say.” “No. He’s fluffy.” “And he has the sharpened antlers to gore us with.” “He’s hanging cookie cutters on them!” Not knowing what else to do they entered the lair to find the beast brewing them a pot of tea. “Um, excuse me Mr…” “Oh, just Barry” “Right, Barry.” faltered Ser Bastin. “Its just that, we thought, well-“ “We’re actually here to slay you and lift your evil curse from the land.” finished Veyla. Barry looked hurt. “My curse? No I’m not into that sort of thing. Try Gertrude across the Pale Sea. She can get a bit grouchy when the weathers not how she likes it.” “But,” Ser Bastin started feeling slightly flabbergasted. “You sent your minions to kill us!” “What? No. They tried to kill you? That’s awkward. I borrowed them from Ernie the Alchemist to help you in your travels. Hope they didn’t do any harm. Those beaks did look a tad sharp.” “And you poisoned us with that cursed picnic basket. We were hallucinating for days!” added Veyla. “Aha, oops! I’ll have to tweak that recipe.” “And you planted that map which led us straight into the demonic forest.” “Daisy Woods has a demon problem these days? Oh dear. I’ll get some professionals in to look at it.” “So we’ve just risked life and limb, underwent the most challenge quest in all our experience as adventurers so far to be sat down and offered a cup of tea!?!” Ser Bastin exploded. “I’m afraid so. Do you take sugar?”