My father was a sherriff's deputy and both my parents were abusive. I'd get screamed at by my mother the instant I walked in the door from school if I didnt immediately go and make her feel loved/appreciated. She'd tell me, "just wait until your father gets home" then send me to my room. My father would get home and she'd meet him at the front door and just lie about whatever she felt would get the worst reaction out of him and he would come into my room and not say a thing. He'd just start beating me and if I said anything I'd be screamed at to shut up and stop lying. If I cried I'd hear, the stop crying line and he'd always mix it up with, "I'm a cop, I can kill you and I'll get away with it." He wouldnt stop hitting me until I was completely calm and not making a sound, whichbis hard when you're being beaten.

He'd use his fists, or his gun belt, more than a few times he threatened to shoot me and waved his gun in my face. When I was little I once went to a school teacher I thought I could trust, she reported it and the cops showed up. The cop recognized my last name (it's really uncommon) and knew my father. He took me home and told my dad I was "telling lies about him." I got severely beaten for that, and I learned to never tell anyone anything and lie if I was asked. I'd go to school with a black eye or other injuries and just say "°I fell." Fortunately in those days the teachers were happy to ignore it.

My parents would send my youngest sister and I to stay with my mothers parents. My grandfather molested my sister and my grandmother beat and tortured me. I have scars all over as a result of grandmother "chasing the evil out of me." My parents never did shit about it. As an adult my mother admitted she had hoped I'd have been killed by them.

I haven't spoken to them in years, and I'm far from ever being okay. I'll find peace when I'm flushing my mothers ashes down the toilet when she's dead. Until then I just try and get by the best I can.