thanks for replying.
all of your notes basically hit right on the mark. My expectations are high, but that's because compounded by the already busy modern family life...i never feel like i am doing enough for my dog...or training him to the point where he fits in without stressing us out.
i wanted him to get to a point to understand why we cant do things like
basically. i am tired. struggling to keep up with the dog, and the work, and the home responsibilities, and personal life that I am now neglecting.
the vets are of no help whatsoever and i am feeling like nobody cares about our struggle. i cant even book a trainer session.
i didn't imagine dog ownership to be this tiring...for some reason everyone else doesn't seem as stressed out about their dog as I am and they have WAY crazier dogs than i have. i wanted to have a dog competent enough to do this canine good citizenship and do agility work...and now I'm realizing almost 2 years down the road there is just not enough time in the day for anything to feel enjoyable? i feel like i am just going through the motions without being able to have time to clear my head
maybe I'm just stressed out to the oblivion and i have no way out...and that makes me feel awful. i don't want to feel stressed out all the time about fulfilling his needs, my partners needs, my work needs...
having a companion was supposed to be a joyful thing, not something exhausting to the point that i am literally guilt tripping myself for not putting in enough effort. I am trying to take a step back and reassess things...but there is only 24 hours in a day. that's just not enough and will never be enough for everything.
i work a minimum of 8 hours a day, sometimes from home, sometimes at work. I have to spend 1-2 hours a night managing my side business, and the rest of that time i am either doing chores at home (which is split with my husband who also works full time), and then split with spending time with the dog and training and playing which is also split with my husband.
honestly I just i don't know how people do this day to day & even have the time to throw at it.
they are either so cash rich that they can afford to throw money at everything , or don't have to work full time...I don't even have kids (I'm not planning on it).
if i don't work we literally could not afford to purchase a home where we are, and the cost of living is crazy expensive where we are.