I don’t think you’re wrong for wanting to be straight, if that’s what you want then I can respect that and it’s not an odd thought at all. My life would have been much easier if I was born straight. The issue starts with the fact that you can’t become straight, so why even entertain the thought? People bring up acceptance to you because that’s the only path you have in which you’re content.

I completely understand the whole anal thing too. I’m gay and exactly the same—I don’t like anal. I dislike the whole thing but especially bottoming. There are people out there like you in that regard, I’m proof of that.

You don’t have to be lonely, it just takes a bit of extra effort because our dating pool is so much smaller.

I don’t want to be presumptuous, but from your post it seems like you’re judging a pretty massive community by the loud majority. Of course you’re going to think every gay is on Grindr looking for hookups or into anal, because those are the types of gays who are loudly advertising themselves for sex. Like, you’re not going to find someone who’s not into sex on Grindr. You probably won’t find the type of guy you’re into on dating/hookup apps at all.

It also feels like you’re pretty negatively judging people because they’re into things that you’re not into like social media, sex, and other things. There’s nothing wrong with people being into those things, they’re just different from you.

I hope you’re able to find your own contentment, wherever that may be.