I would imagine it's cathartic for those women, and feel pity for the guys all you want, but generally, the women get the worse end of the deal, so I don't fault them for wanting that release.

I had a best friend who told me it was "too painful" to be friends with me while he "watched me date people who weren't him" while he "would have treated me so much better than them," since he was "so in love with me."

He did this via facebook messenger. On my 21st birthday. While I was at my birthday dinner with my parents (which he knew about).

This is a guy who I had previously given an "out" to, telling him flat out that I wasn't interested in him as anything more than a friend, and that if that wasn't enough, and he wanted to end the friendship over it, I'd understand. He assured me that wasn't the case. Then apparently changed his mind a month or so later, which just happened to coincide with my birthday.

He even asked me to act like I didn't know him at work.

Ever had your best friend abruptly cut contact and tell you never to speak to them again? It fucking hurts. And it absolutely influences how you'll see relationships and friendships in the future.

I guess the main thing is, the detriment to the "nice guy" is that he doesn't get his dick wet. The detriment to the woman is that she suddenly finds out her entire friendship with that person was a fabrication (a con, really) with the exclusive intent of getting laid.

I saw a post the other day that put it well. It shouldn't be called 'friend-zoning', but 'fuck-zoning'. One side thinks they have a standard friendship, the other is acting like they're a friend in hopes of getting laid. Which of these two people is the problem, again?