Those are both bad compromises when the goal is nice Christmas family photos. The only professional photos I ever had taken before my wedding were going to JCPenney's every couple of years with my family as a kid. No offense if that's what someone likes or is all that they can afford, but they are not good quality.

A good compromise would be asking what that $300 package entails, and if there was a cheaper package offered by the photographer or if she had checked out any other photographers in the area for pricing comparisons. We don't know if OOP did that, maybe he did, but the two "compromises" outlined aren't good and come across as very dismissive about what she was actually wanting. She's in the wrong for taking money from the shared emergency fund, full stop, but she's not the only one who seems to not care at all what her spouse thinks. That relationship sounds unhealthy and exhausting on multiple levels.