OH man, this is temporary and will take a long will of patience.

To keep it short, I felt that at age 19. I got back together with (man) and married, started a family.

Very much domestic abuse things happened for the next 20 yrs.

I left in 2009.

ANYWAY, the point of my post is, in all the time and self-healing, prayer groups, therapy, blah blah blah, that I have done since 2004, I ended up thinking like you.

Guess what? I met a man. A new man that is completely different and in tune with who I am.

I wrote off feeling stupid for failed relationships for so long and today am actively defining what my new relationship will be and fulfill me giving and taking like a normal human.

Don't feel stupid. Feel that maybe your ex is smart, kind and telling you to wait for things that are more fitting.