I haven't got nearly as much pressure and stuff as you but I can relate to it. I'm sorry to hear that. And his comment about makeup is weird too IMO. I am in my final year of uni and luckily this hasn't happened to me but it still can happen if I decide to stay on campus (after the pandemic) if I want to go to grad school. You and I are around the age when people decide to get married so that is what I relate to the most: the fear of being left behind. I am trying to think of what to do. I in a way always knew I would be career-oriented so I hope it will distract me once I enter the workforce. I hope to find friends who are similar to me or at least respect this identity. I hope to find friends who care about their friends and not just their SO.