I just want to tell you that I used to know guys like your ex...like formed a weird friendship with a guy just like this. I met him through my ex, like he and my ex were good friends (my ex actually copied a few of this guy's traits after a while). The guy in question was so charismatic, like he just had this presence that you could not ignore. He was provocative, he would say and do things that would demand your attention but then he would revert back to being silent and just observing others. When you were in a room with him, you felt important if he looked at you, because of how he just was . I think I fancied him but at the same time, I watched him with his girlfriends and other girls and I watched him destroy his girlfriends through crazy mind games.

I remember the first time I saw him having a fight with his girlfriend. She was pretty much begging him to stop thinking about her as a cheater because her ex had contacted her on facebook and she replied and had just a normal conversation with him. But he was not having it. He literally went stone cold on here, called her everything under the sun, kicked her out of his house and when she wouldn't leave, he grabbed her and just literally threw her out while she was in bits crying and screaming. It was hard to watch, this girl was emotionally just in tatters and he was just cold and looked at her like she was his worst enemy, no love in his eyes.

A few days later, I remember seeing him again and he talked to me a bit about it. He basically told me that he had trust issues from his mother, his mother neglected him basically and was still a really hard woman towards him and he learnt from that that women are 'heartless' and can destroy a man's soul and they will just hurt a guy when they can if they can. I tried to tell him that his girlfriend clearly loved him though, otherwise she wouldn't have gone to such lengths to show him that she did. Then he basically said, yeah, I know she thinks she loves me, but in my books what she did wasn't love, she betrayed me by replying to her ex and by letting him even have the means of contacting her, if she wanted attention from a guy, it should be me. But then I found out through that same conversation that actually he had been cheating on her for a while and she never knew. He was just projecting himself on to her. If he could cheat, then so could she now.

Then I got talking to the girl about 2 weeks later. I remember asking her, why do you want him back ? Like he's scary when he's angry, like that's not normal ? And she just said that basically their love was perfect before that, so intense, so amazing, that he made her feel like she was the most important girl on the planet. She said that having him love her meant more than another guy loving her, because he told her he would never be able to trust a girl or love a girl ever, but then he fell for her. And you know what? She was right because as I got to know the guy more, I really saw that he just did not trust people one bit and he treated girls mostly with disdain. He would cheat on this girl, sure, but that was because it was too hard to really admit to himself how much he loved this girl and how he might actually be broken up if she ever left him, so he wanted to safe guard himself. When her ex contacted her, that was it, he felt his fears coming true and it was just 'proof' that no girl can be trusted and that you should never give your heart to a girl because they'll break you. I saw him cry over her, I saw him go through depression, I saw him get into physical fights with strangers because of all his pent up emotion over this girl 'betraying' him. She definitely meant a lot to him.

But did he ever tell her how much he was hurting? Nope. He just would tell her cruel things, like saying how she was this and that and 'crazy' and all these things just to try and bring her down to where he was. He made it look like he wasn't affected by it to her, but everyone else who was around him at the time saw how downhill he was going over it. He got even bigger into drugs and would just party all the time and have sex with random girls and then kick them out the next day and be cold and heartless to everyone.

Ok so you might or might not have seen your ex in this little story :P 'intense, magnetic, amazing guy who swears of trusting and falling in love, falls in love with girl, have an intense very passionate 'out of this world' relationship in terms of emotion and connection and passion, her ex contacts her and boom...hell is unleashed and the guy goes stone cold like he's never even loved her in the first place, like she's the scum of the earth.

How did it end for these two fucked up romeo and juliets? They got back together about 2 months later, but then he just thought that because he had said such horrible stuff to her and put her through emotional hell, she only was getting back with him now so that she could hurt him and betray him in a real way. Why did that make sense to him? Because he wouldn't have wanted anyone back who treated him so coldly and callously unless he could get a chance to hurt them and make them pay. So yeah they broke up again, big fights, big emotional turmoil. She went a bit crazy, like I'm not sure if she's bpd, she seemed normal before she met the guy, but she got into SH and taking lots of drugs and drinking and being reckless because of the fighting and break up and it made her self esteem plummet.

But then she pulled herself back up and weirdly, I saw them chatting away about maybe 7 months after their last big break up and looking quite happy and friendly. I asked her what was going on, she was basically saying how they took time apart, she got herself back together, he got over the initial emotions that came with the break up and they were texting and talking again. She seemed to be hopeful that they were about to get back together. It kind of looked like he was flirting with her too. It didn't happen though, he actually started dating my friend at that time and I could tell the original girl was quite disappointed but she moved on and now they're just seperate.