Hello my friend :),

I appreciate the response, don't worry about the length of them, like I said, it's worth every word.

I can see how you say that it is okay to feel that doubt and guilt and shame after making a decision you are not sure why you made. I mean, it's not okay but we have to make it okay because it's just what comes along with our disease. I'm honestly having a hard time dealing with that, it is hard to reach out to friends for advice in regards to this because I feel like for us , the line between what's good and bad is very blurry. I wanted to ask if you ever had to deal with infidelity towards your SO. Ever made a mistake while being in a manic state and then couldn't process with yourself why you did such thing? I feel like I'm constantly worried I am going to cheat on my guy. We are not official but have established to stay exclusive. Another update on this situation is, I feel he is braking things soon because he doesn't want to deal with a Bipolar person. And to be honest, I feel better prepared to him taking this decision thanks to your initial response. I really can't stress enough how much that post helped me out. Thank you again!

Im replying from my phone so I'll reply with different comments just so that I can go back and re read what you wrote