I just want to say this is really good advice.

I was a child who discovered masturbation through rubbing against my jeans. I used this method up until I was in college. It was easy, fast, familiar and got the job done.

The only problem was that my brain was so used to coming from this method and this method alone, that nothing else worked. Vibrators felt weird, hands felt too gentle, and nothing ever felt as good as the hard friction of my jeans.

I essentially had to train myself to come with my boyfriend. At first, when he was going down on me, it felt weirdly intense and not necessarily in a good way. It was like my nerves were getting the sensations, just my brain was interpreting it weirdly, like sharp electricity versus pleasure. Eventually, it got to the point where I would get just to the peak of coming, but my body would become overstimulated and it would just start to hurt or fade.

I had to train my body to respond. In order to come, I had to trick my body into coming. It took work. I learned that your brain doesn't like being disconnected from your body. If your body is behaving a certain way, your brain usually takes cues from how you're behaving and matches it.

So, when my boyfriend when down on me, it took work. I would moan, hold my breath, pant, buck my hips, clench and release all of my muscles repeatedly and do really strong kegals. I always hold onto the bed frame, so I can tense all of my muscles while I told my breath, and then exhale on a moan. My body caught up very quickly. Once I started doing that, the sensations changed from a sharp, uncomfortable electricity to a warm, growing arousal. I want to say it took a few more times from when I started doing this with my boyfriend, until I was able to come.

Don't give up! I found that just relaxing and letting it happen didn't work for me. I actually had to teach my body how to react when I was with my boyfriend.