"You can be 100% sure your SO is getting ready to leave you, or hates you, or is deliberately doing stuff to piss you off. That's BPD. You choosing to act on those feelings is YOU. It's YOUR choice. Work is stressful, which makes you short tempered, irritable, etc? You think you're going to get fired and everyone hates you? Yeah, that's BPD. Not taking a second to breathe and bring yourself back into now, so you go off on your boss/coworker and get fired? That's your actions."

since my last breakup, i've been reflecting a lot on my actions and what made the girl i loved leave. i have never been to a mental health specialist so I have no diagnosis of BPD but everything I'm reading about this disorder, the more I see myself having those same symptoms. Impassivity, drug abuse, never had a stable relationship because i'm always in my head and can't let things go their way naturally. Lots of assuming and no real proof. it happens every time i develop feelings for someone, i cannot let myself go and be loved. And when someone loves me, I get scared and think something must be wrong with that person. when i'm in love i expect the person to do as I wish. if the person doesn't give me what I think I deserve, I start to think they don't like me, leave me, etc. Then again, I don't understand myself when someone loves me, I feel guilty because i feel i can never love someone and no one can ever love me. i've read somewhere that the thinking is a lot of black and white, and love can turn into hate within a short time because my brain over exaggerates and i always already lost in my head before i even get an answer. can u guys relate?