The truth of the matter is, that the HL, LL in a relationship together problem is only solved when both are willing to make concessions. The LL has to agree to have sex more often than they want. The HL has to agree to have sex less often than they want. Hopefully, you can meet somewhere approximating the middle. I'm LL. My HL SO is very good. I enjoy sex a lot... sometimes. It's not a matter of technique. He knows all the right buttons to push, but the sad fact is that sometimes the buttons aren't hooked up right then. It is very helpful and encouraging for me to be able to say that it's not working for me right now, you go on and get yours, I'm ok- without him taking it the wrong way. It took a while for my SO to believe the fact that sometimes, it's just going to have to be duty sex, and that it's not his fault, and that he doesn't hold it against me (heh). It's not because I'm not trying, but because I genuinely want sex less often than he does. It takes a lot of the pressure off if I can just help him out sometimes, because the fireworks will come another time. They always do.