About ten years ago I got a job tending bar at a very hard to get in place where all the girls were super gorgeous. I was kind of like you now - I was going through a rough time and not taking care of myself. I went into it with a positive attitude and it ended up helping me turn myself around. After a few years there I looked the best I ever had in my life. Just because someone is really pretty doesn't necessarily mean they are going to be a mean person the way a lot of people would have you believe. Some of the kindest people I've met are also the most beautiful. You passed important markers for this job that I bet a lot of people wouldn't be able to. You should be proud of that. This could be a new chapter for you!