Honestly there’s a lot to digest there…don’t wanna give you some bullshit “haha just do this” statement….but I do relate.

This afternoon I Just started reading “man’s search for meaning”. I was in tears by page 30. Page 38 I was back to whiskey. Pretty insightful, but bottom line conclusion from an Auschwitz survivor is that without love, there’s no reason to live, hope, strive, try, etc. but deep down I think we all know this.

I’ve been without any form of love for a while now. Several years. It’s getting damn hard to take but I’m not raised to quit.

I watched the love of my life kill herself slowly.

I wasn’t even a drinker at that point. Yes I’d been drunk and had done some dumb shit, but I finally convinced her to go to rehab. She was suffering.

I was gonna pay whatever it cost. We actually drove there.

On the day after 7 years of trying to get her to go, she finally agreed. We drove together, hand in hand, both crying out of fear and relief…..We arrived in the parking lot….Turns out they were closed that day. Lucky her….