I was also abused by a women growing up. I am very sorry to hear about your experiences. I think many women get a pass to say these things do to the nature of the patriarchy, and the risk and oppression women still experience due to just being born women. It is seen by some people as more of an act of rebellion against the patriarchy, and not necessarily any individual men. That being said men are often told from birth about how they are more gross and worthy of derision than women. "Snips snails and puppy dog tales" for example. So its easy to see why attacks on mens appearance are treated so lightly due to cultural norms as well. Imo You gotta just let this stuff roll of your back. Life is too hard already without this extra worry. You just gotta learn to laugh it off and move forward in life, ignoring the bullshit you might hear along the way. Its hard sometimes, but if yet to find a better way. I hope things work out well. My heart goes out to you.