I can speak on this. I'm coming out the other end of a similar situation.

I had back surgery September 2020. The last two years have been a real uphill climb to get better. This has certainly put a huge strain on my relationship. Getting the proper support from my GF consistently was tough.

Sleeping with a spinal injury and nerve pain is next to impossible - I slept when I could, which meant there likely were days where I slept well into the afternoon. These times were met with passive-aggressive remarks about 'still in bed, huh?'.

Driving and sitting caused searing pain. As a result, I typically looked for rides to all my weekly appointments so as I could comfortably lay down in the backseat. My GF would offer to help whenever needed, but as the months went on, alot of the times I asked for a ride or help in some way, those requests were meant with rolling eyes, discontent, and just negative body language. So I stopped asking completely. My best friend and my older brother were god sends. I could not have done it without them.

These are just a couple examples. I'm still not fully healed and still have bad days.

My point is, I stayed. We're alot better now then this time last year but it has not been easy. I can tell I am holding onto alot of hurt and anger by what I perceived as a lack of support from my girlfriend during the roughest days in 2020, and I am not too sure if I will be able to move past it. We're trying though but the fact that I'm still on this journey to recovery is not helping. One thing I've realized is that I needed to make myself a priority instead of putting on a strong face so as to avoid any arguments with my girlfriend. In the past there might've been times where I lied to my girlfriend about my current state simply to avoid any remarks and fights - this is what I regret the most.

Stay or leave - that's going to be a very personal thing I think - but the advice I can give to you is just stay true to what you and your body need. In times like this it's okay to be a little more selfish. If she's not on the same page as you about you needing to make yourself a priority to heal, then walk away. There were times where I could feel tension in the air with my girlfriend and as a result I would do something to simply avoid the conflict, rather then do the correct thing that my body needed (ex. We'd have plans to go see her parents on a weekend afternoon. I might have been sore and probably would have benefitted from added rest, but to avoid the conflict I would still go with her.). Don't change what you need to do to heal just because of her.

And to anyone who hasn't felt it - Back pain is by far the most pain I have ever felt in my life. I lived quite an active life and have had concussions, broken bones, multiple tears, stitches, you name it - but I've never had anything put me down like spine and nerve issues. To be in pain and discomfort 24 hours a day takes a toll on both your mental and physical being. I hope you get better soon OP.