Time and a lot of reflecting. I feel like once you’re removed from the situation, it may take a few weeks or months, but eventually you will look back and think “I really deserve better than that”. You also start to realize a lot of the stuff you put up with or went through, you would NEVER accept but found yourself rolling with all the punches just to keep the relationship alive. I was struggling with letting go for at least a year after I was dumped and I would literally write out a pros and cons list of having my ex back in my life vs starting fresh with a new partner. As you could imagine, there were many more cons to rekindling with a toxic ex and seeing it written down on paper really did it for me. When the time finally came where I did had an opportunity to rekindle things, I had absolutely no want to share my life with him again and it felt sooooo good