I brought the conversation of where our marriage was heading up on Monday, ran on into Tuesday. Finally after all these years I've got the answers I was looking for. She knew she was 'LL before we married, didn't think it was worth mentioning, even though she knew I was very HL. She knew I was deeply unhappy with frequency but because she was happy enough chose to do nothing. When I stopped initiating five or six years ago she assumed I was having an affair, I wasn't, I'd just been rejected once too often. So we had nothing for five years. Once in that time I had the talk with her, got me nowhere. January this year she asks if I'm having an affair. I had been for a few weeks, was quite blatant about it. She wanted me to stay, tried to have sex but I had nothing stirring for her. She moved us back into the same bedroom. She couldn't understand how I could want sex with a stranger but not her, not that she ever actually tried, she was lying there but she wasn't there. Finally this week I have my answer. In her words ''i wouldn't care if I never had sex again, and I'm not opening my legs to keep ANY man'' Wish she'd said shit like that year's ago, but at least she has now. She's refused counselling, therapy, doctor, as far as she's concerned this is just her. She asked if I would end the marriage over sex, I asked would she end it to not have sex. I've been learning how to handle the way she tried to get me into being the unreasonable one all the time, no matter how valid I was. So now she says we should live together as friends because we can't afford to run two households. I'm still allowed to be provider apparently. Unfortunately when she compared me to ANY man my last feelings died. Not sure why she thinks I would worry about how she's going to keep her household when I'm gone. I think she's starting to realise that the big house, the Mercedes, the big spending are over. Thank you for being there